sacred cows 4 slaughter

At the Antiques Rude Show, you’ll need tickets which are readily available for free just so long as you’ve made a hefty donation to PBS. Show up at a convention center packing your treasured stuff and have the Chemo Brothers bitch to high heaven that you’ve not kept an original finish. Hell, that all by itself knocked ten grand off the value of your treasure. Doesn’t matter that your treasured stuff is EXACTLY how you received it.

That hideous old painting that grandma kept in the darkened corner of grandma’s house might bring 10K IF you’ll kick in a minimum of three grand to have it cleaned. Professionally of course.

Treasures that might have brought you the big bucks ten years back, well, those treasures aren’t worth today the price of packing the crap to the Rude Show and being condescended to by the “professional appraisers.”

“If this painting had its original dovetail framing and you had the sense to not allow your progenitors to mess with the original, you might have made bank. Oh well.”

The camera pans down the line that stretches a way down the block and stops occasionally on the face of Mopey Moe holding his ticket to fame and fortune. It turns out that Mopey Moe gets 15 seconds at the end of Antiques Rude Show to moan about his treasure not being worth squat BUT, it was worth the six-hour drive and the five hundred bucks it cost to get to the Rude Show.

“Hey Ma, I’m on TV!”

Tune in next week when Walberg visits Anacostia’s World Famous Penisary Museum and Visitor Shoppe.

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